Porn Addiction Versus Sex Addiction
Difference Porn Addiction And Sex Addiction – Robert Robison answers this question for you in this video.
What’s the Difference Porn & Sex Addiction?
Well, exactly that. Someone could say well sex addiction is porn addiction, porn addiction is sex addiction – addiction is addiction. That’s one of the things that I say to my clients and they’ll be like,
‘Well how do I know this is an addiction and this isn’t?’
Addiction is addiction is addiction. If you’re participating in a behavior that has negative consequences, despite promises and commitments to stop, you’re engaged in an addictive behavior.
One of my teen clients was like,
‘Yeah. So water’s an addiction.’
You know and I kind of laughed at him and I said,
‘Okay so you’re drinking so much water that you’re having to be hospitalized?’
(Teen Client) ‘Well no, no no no. I’ve never had to be hospitalized.’
I said,
‘So you drink so much water that it’s harmful to your body?’
(Teen Client) ‘Well, I could.’
(Man) ‘But have you?’
(Teen Client) ‘Well, no.’
(Man) ‘Then it’s not an addiction because there’s no negative consequences. In fact, you could have the opposite of addiction, which is you’re not getting enough water. So you’re not getting the liquid that you need, so you’re hurting your body. We should have I think they say 8 cups of water a day or 8-12.’
And so that’s how we can help define addiction is participating in a substance or behavior that has negative consequences despite repeated attempts or promises to stop.
Can sex addiction, can sex be a healthy behavior? Well, absolutely.
Can sex become an addictive behavior? Yes.
Pornography Falling Off a Cliff
Pornography is interesting because pornography addiction is not participating in a sexual behavior with commitment.
We have these receptors in our brain, neural receptors, called oxytocin and these are the connection chemicals.
Oxytocin is almost like a bridge which connects person A with person B.
Now for producing oxytocin and we’re not bridging that chemical in a healthy committed way, what will happen is we’ll feel like we’re falling off a cliff.
If we’re participating in a sexual behavior where no commitment is present, like pornography for example or with a prostitute or something on those levels, there’s no commitment there.
It’s a pseudo-relationship and it leaves one feeling empty.
It almost creates this massive influx of oxytocin with nowhere to go or nowhere to connect and so it almost feels like we fall off a cliff, and addicts understand this emotion. They’ll say,
‘You know, I just feel so empty and so gross’,
or whatever the emotions are that they’re feeling,
‘So shameful inside’.
The shameful emotion is often coming because that oxytocin is not connecting emotionally with anyone else and it actually can create feelings which can be very harmful to us by:
- It raises stress levels.
- It creates more anxiety.
- It raises our levels of cortisol, which is our emotional healing chemical.
And when we have too much cortisol, it can start breaking down our immune system and actually make us sick. Addicts often report as they’re going through binges that their health gets worse, and that is very true.
Whether we’re defining sex addiction or pornography addiction help, that’s really up to you and the person that you’re working with.
Just because someone has been exposed to pornography with a group of friends in high school doesn’t mean they’re addicted to pornography, right at that moment.
Now, if they start participating in the behavior, it starts dominating their thoughts, they find themselves beginning to isolate, moil and participate in that behavior, that’s where the addiction really houses itself.
Be honest with yourself, sex can be an addiction, porn can be an addiction, and it really depends on where and what you’re doing with this behavior to determine if it’s an addiction or not.
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